‘Get lost…you cheap Bihari’

“Get lost… You cheap Bihari…”

These words were uttered to me by someone who claimed to understand me the most. So, by that logic these words ought to be right.

Not only me listen these beautiful phrases, but many poor fellows, who don’t even know whether Bihar is in the south India or on the border of Delhi or somewhere in Africa, listen it daily on buses, road, police stations, classes and in modern houses.

However, by the punch of the sound and the intensity that the phrase carries, one might imagine Bihar to be somewhere between Somalia and Nigeria. (Due respect to both these nations)

Many of you must be thinking it as an abuse bestowed on me (after all aren’t all the Biharis pieces of stinking shits scattered around as someone’s loose motion?). All of you are right.

By the above understanding of the culture of India in general and Bihar in particular, there is no need to use cheap as an adjective.

Being born as a Bihari itself is a cheap thing to do (though that’s not in our hands). So using cheap with Bihari is grammatically wrong. Henceforth, Bihari means cheap Bihari in the article.

Biharis are generally cheap. Most of the industries in Delhi, Mumbai etc. have abundance of these cheap human beings who drive industries of these metro. The so called 4th class labour is provided by these cheap Biharis.

In a way we wipe your ass because if we don’t, you will stink of your own shit neither knowing where it stinks nor how to wipe it off.

What happens if the growth rate of Bihar is 11.03%, 2nd in India among states! Nothing… We are Biharis and will always be so. The remarkable point is, we are proud of this little fact.

And yes, we are sorrily behind Delhi, Mumbai etc. in crime and the great art of raping. I will surely talk about this to our chief minister face to face. (backward lots!!! he is not on the great public platform called Facebook!)

These half population of these cheap Biharis are not indulged in militancy nor the remaining half is always on a high.

Rather we have taken some really coward type of jobs. Such as a few (couldn’t count how many because as per a data either the SP or the Collector or both in each of the district of india should be a Bihari, a relatively small number!) IAS officers, railways, telecommunications, media etc. and of course your neighborhood sabjiwala, rikshawala, cooks, shopkeepers and what not…

This is not something to be ashamed of. Biharis have lived by ‘earning’ their bread and not by ‘brokering’ which is the prime profession of the metros.

We are very cheap so you can approach us, use our services and can say good bye as and when you desire. And the beauty is, Bihari won’t say a word because… he is a cheap Bihari.

Yes I agree that we are very unhygienic people as we don’t ask the golgappe-wala, “Bhaiya Ye mineral water me banaya hai na?”.

The point is, leave alone the history of Buddha, Nalanda university et al, we have made the present to work for us. We are milking every bit that our nation gave us to utilize.

It’s a free nation and we can move anywhere (yeah barring 370), your roads shine, because someone cleans them, you have a great Metro Train because there are a huge number of people from all over India working inside.

Don’t give us fake identities when you don’t have your own. It’s not your choice to live without us because you will find this hard working lot everywhere. And because you consider your status to be higher just because you use the western style of lavatories to shit with the little known fact that you don’t know how to properly use them, we are not a tad smaller.

Your saying ‘Bihari’ in utter disgust speaks volumes of your knowledge about this land mass. I pity you because we have beaten you in your backyard. We come to your universities and become the best, we apply for the jobs in your states and constitutionally snatch them off your teeth, we enter your realms and make them ours… Not by crook but by the sheer use of brain.

The brain which you use to churn out abuses, a Bihari uses it to write an article on it. This is what a Bihari means! Throw bricks at us and we have a house and then you crib about that.

The fact of the matter is, you are just jealous. Your whole being is on credit, you think because there is some Tina, Mina or Nageena thinking for you. Your whole perception comes from the fakeness all around you.

Had these Biharis not been around, you will run out of ideas. You are so fake that you doubt how a black cow gives white milk! Respect your individuality and don’t fear or be jealous of Biharis, fight us and prove yourselves.

We don’t say we are better, we say we are human beings. I am not begging for my identity because your cribbing doesnt affect me.

Even if some of us drive a cyclerikshaw, it is to take you to your destination.

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